A structured workbook for understanding your family relationships — the past that shaped them, the present you’re living, and the future you want to build.
Some family dynamics are hard to name. You know something feels off — or painful, or stuck — but you don’t quite have the words, the framework, or the distance to see it clearly. What Happened to Us gives you all three.
This workbook includes over 40 exercises and prompts that help you sort through the story of your family relationships in a structured, compassionate way. You’ll explore the early experiences that still echo in the present, identify unmet needs and the skills that never got modeled, and — if you choose — prepare for a real, grounded conversation with someone who matters to you.
This workbook is for:
- Adult children who are making sense of a complicated past.
- Parents reflecting on their own childhood, relationships with adult child, or the parenting they provided. If you are parent, I recommend that you start by exploring your own childhood experiences before turning to the one with your children.
- Therapist seeking structure and practical tools for working with family dynamics in adult relationships.
- Anyone hoping to understand a painful family dynamic more clearly.
“Your family shaped you before you had the words for it. This workbook helps you find them.”
— Dr. Rana
What’s inside
Each section combines explanation and theory with reflection prompts and exploration exercises — so you’re never just answering questions in a vacuum. You understand why you’re asking them.
- 42 reflections & exercises
- What is a “healthy enough” relationship
- Exploring family history and patterns
- Identifying unmet needs and missing skills
- Understanding the present dynamic
- Understanding the other person
- A guide to having a difficult conversation about the past
- Additional resources and worksheets
The workbook includes theory, guided reflection prompts, and exploration exercises.
Work through it at your own pace — in private, or alongside a therapist.
Looking for more resources? Take a look at the resources and worksheets